What it really means to assume positive intent
“Assume positive intent” is a phrase that entered the corporate lexicon several years ago and found its way into countless mission statements, and employee value propositions. I personally have worked at several organizations that proudly proclaimed “assume positive intent” as a key employee behavioural model. In many cases, it was festooned on mugs and posters in the break room.
But what does it actually mean? Generally, it suggests that you pause before forming a negative opinion of someone and assume that they mean well, are doing their best. and might simply be misguided. So, if you work with someone for the first time and they undercut you, take credit for your work, or otherwise appear to screw you over, you can decide to hate them right then and there, or if you want to assume positive intent, you can decide that first impressions are often wrong, you don’t know them well enough to know where they’re coming from and you’re going to give them a pass this time or at least until you have more context from which to make an informed decision.
In work and in life, assuming positive intent is harder than it looks. We’ve all been burned by people who have taken advantage of our kindness and, If you’ve been around corporate culture for long enough, you’re familiar with all the various office personalities. You have probably also seen enough backstabbing, credit taking and elbow jostling that it’s much easier to simply assign the obvious label to a person or situation and save yourself the time it will take to assume positive intent, only to be proven right a month later.
Me heading into the office assuming positive intent about the difficult person I’m meeting with later…
But I recently had a lesson in what “assume positive intent” actually means. I was on a call with a work colleague. I was aware of him by name but this was our first interaction. In our discussion, I said something inappropriate and misguided. I spoke from emotion in the moment and immediately recognized my error but didn’t want to compound it by blurting out a hurried apology with a bunch of other people on the call. So I followed up with him privately afterwards, explained that I realized I was out of line and said I was sorry and I truly was. He said “It didn’t offend me but it would likely offend others so it’s good to follow up and double-check. Also, in these cases, I always assume positive intent until I know people really well.”
I was floored. After several years of throwing this phrase around, I actually experienced someone using it, in a good and genuine way rather than rolling their eyes and assuming they know everything about a person based on one interaction. I realize that I only discovered the actual value of assuming positive intent when I was the personal beneficiary of it and that is unfortunate but since then, I have been much more aware of my tendency towards judgment and I can sheepishly admit it’s a better way to go through life.